Marriage Is In Trouble Because Young People Are Dating Rationally.

It makes sense to date someone who shares your values, your politics, and your ambition.

Photo by René Ranisch on Unsplash

New York Times writer Jessica Grose has been penning a really interesting series of columns and newsletters on politics and dating for the under-30 set, addressing questions like whether opinions on abortion rights influence romantic choices and whether a potential date’s politics can be a dealbreaker. This week, she looks at romantic sorting, how couples increasingly pair off according to both education and income, and argues that ambition may matter more than politics in dating today. Much has been written — most of it in a worried tone — about the radical shift in romantic sorting that has characterized American marriages over the past two decades. One thing Grose doesn’t say but I think is implied is that this romantic sorting is less about individual classism or attempts to enshrine inequality and more about rational decision-making and increases in gender equality — including upticks in the number of men who want to marry women who are their professional and educational equals. And individual romantic choices, perhaps, are not the ideal vehicles for stamping out socioeconomic inequalities.